Forever Yours
by clrlyhpy
Summary: Even though Patricia broke up with Eddie, she never got over him. Ever.
1. Chapter 1

Forever Yours

Patricia's POV

It was an unexpectedly nice day at Anubis House. I was in an unusually good mood, until I saw Him. He was the bad boy I had unwillingly, but assuredly fallen in love with. He wasn't my type, all blonde and popular, but we did have one thing in common, rebellion, and I had fell for him all the same. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop it. It didn't matter how many times I insulted him, or tried to get him to leave me alone, he would always show up again at my door. He was like one of those god-awful sweaters your grandma gives you, that it doesn't matter how many times you try to throw it out, hide it, or give it away, it always finds a way to creep back up on you. That was him. Eddie. He wasn't one to give up, especially on me. I liked that. It was one of the reasons I was wondering why he wasn't trying to win me back. Yes, I broke up with him. I guess you could say I didn't have a good reason, but I felt I had to. Before I get to attached to him. Serious relationships freak me out. I don't like, and I can't deal with long-term commitments. I also am scared to death of getting hurt. But it doesn't really matter that I broke up with him, because I can't get him out of my head. God, he is so annoying. Every time I tell myself that I can do this, I can forget him, I look up and there he is, all perfect body and big brown puppy-dog eyes, and I just can't help it. I melt all over again. But no way was I going to tell him I wanted to get back together. I'm Patricia, I don't do mushy talk. And, plus, he is the guy. I looked over at Eddie from my seat at the breakfast table. He looked happy, cracking some lame-ass joke to a certain upbeat, curly-haired girl that I'm not entirely fond of. I might be a tiny bit jealous. I got up suddenly from the table, without realizing it, not wanting to see Eddie flirting with another girl, specifically KT Rush. Everyone looked at me. "What are you all looking at!?" I spat. Still standing, I left the table and went to my room to get away from everything.

Eddie's POV

She's acting really odd today... I wonder what that was about. These angry moods from Patricia used to be about me, but not anymore. Not since she broke up with me anyway. For no reason I might add. I loved her so much, and I thought she did too. We were so happy. I still love her. I wish I didn't, but I do. God, I miss her so much. I still remember every moment we spent together, every insult she ever called me... everything. Even the day she broke my heart.

_I awoke to birds chirping, and the summer sun leaking in through my window, warming my face with it's gentle rays. Patricia laid beside me , still sleeping, her face relaxed and beautiful, almost innocent. I reached down to embrace her hand with mine, and I could swear I saw her smile, just the tiniest bit. "Yacker, time to get up, we have a long day ahead of us in America," I whispered lightly in her ear. She fluttered her eyes, awake, and yawned, looking up at me. She smiled, and reached up to kiss me. I kissed her back, savoring the moment. I pushed her back onto the bed as the kisses intensified. She broke it off, smirking at me. "We should get going Eddie, you know my flight back to England is tonight." _

_"How could I forget?" I said sadly._

_"Where are you taking me today?" She asked me._

_"Anywhere you want to go," I replied. And that's exactly what we did. We went to an amusement park. Cheesy as it sounds, we even went on the Ferris wheel, and kissed when we got to like top, like a normal couple. There was nothing unusually special about the kiss, because I couldn't have known at the time, that that would be our last kiss. When I took her out to dinner, I could tell something was on her mind. She looked sad, and I had no idea why. I couldn't have prepared myself if I wanted to for what was about to happen next. The cab honked, the one that would take Patricia to the airport. I walked her out to the car, and looked over at her preparing to say my goodbyes. I was surprised to see a single tear roll down her cheek. My yacker never cried. Ever. "Geez Yacker," I said, "This is only a temporary goodbye. I'll see you when school starts up again." She didn't say anything to that. Instead she looked me dead in the eye, and told me, "I'm sorry Eddie. We're over." And she got in the car, leaving me in shock. I watched the cab with the love of my life inside it until it disappeared into the horizon, sat down on the sidewalk, and cried.  
_

I was pulled from my memory by KT, who was repeatedly asking me if I was ok. I guessed that some feeling from the breakup were evident and apparent on my face. I told her I was perfectly fine, but I don't think she bought it, because I sure as hell didn't.

Patricia's POV

I walked into my Chem class, and sat down next to my best friend, Joy. She instantly bombarded me with questions. "Trixie, are you OK? What happened this morning? Is this about Eddie?" I shot her a look that could kill. I obviously didn't want to talk about it. She didn't care. "Tell me!" she demanded.

"I saw Eddie flirting with KT," I said, giving in.

"Trish, she'd told you a million times, she isn't into Eddie!"

"Never mind, Joy. Eddie can do whatever he wants. I don't care. I broke up with him, remember?"

"Ya, OK. Why did you anyways?" Rolling my eyes, I said,

"It was getting to serious. If I didn't break up with him, he would have broken up with me. I didn't want to get hurt."

"Really Trixie? Eddie is crazy for you! No way would he have ever dumped you. But, its good to know you still like him."

"What?! OK maybe a little." Joy smiled at me when I said this.

"Knew it!" she said.

"Shut up Joy!" I said, but I was smiling too. I really did still love him.

Eddie's POV

I was heading to class, and just when I was about to walk in, I heard Patricia say something about me flirting with KT. Which is ridiculous, by the way. KT is like my sister. Flirting with your sister. Ew. But that meant she still cared. I listened from the outside of the class, so I didn't have to chance them seeing me. People were starting to give me weird looks, so I had to go in. I went into Chem as quietly as possible, pretty sure Patricia and Joy did even notice me come in, thank God. I took a seat in the corner of the class, straining to make out what they were saying. Yacker was telling Joy why she broke up with me, which was apparently because she has commitment problems. I was actually pretty happy about this, because it meant that she didn't have feelings for someone else. Then she said something that took me completely by surprise. She still liked me! Somehow I had convinced myself she hated me and was already over me, and I was beyond relieved to know that that wasn't true. I couldn't help it. I started smiling like a complete and utter lovestruck idiot.

Patricia's POV

Out of the corner of my eye, I could swear I saw Eddie staring at me. When had he came in? The suspense was killing me, so I looked over and saw him smirking. The realization hit me like a bolt of lightning. That smirk revealed everything to me. Eddie realized I was looking at him and he instantly stopped smirking and look away. But it was too late. I knew he had heard every word I said to Joy. He knew I still like him. I couldn't believe him, spying on me and Joy again. But it was typical, typical Eddie. "I am going to personally murder that slime ball," I mutter.

Eddie's POV

Yacker knows I heard her. Ha Ha. I am practically beaming right now. I know what I am going to do. Stubborn or not, **I am getting my girlfriend back.**

**I updated chapter 2 everyone! check it out! :))  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own House of Anubis.**

Hey all! Hope you like this chapter! Its pretty intense! There is going to be a chapter 3 though, so don't worry :)

Joy's POV

I awoke to a sharp knock on my door. KT and Willow, my roomies now that Patricia moved in with Mara, looked up at me questioning. I yawned, and shrugged my shoulders to show I didn't know, and shut my eyes, trying to fall back asleep. The knocking began again, echoing and tormenting me. I reluctantly got up and opened the door. The figure dragged me into the hall and closed the door behind us. I groaned when I saw who it was. "Eddie?" I said annoyed, "What could you possibly want at 6:30 am?"

"Can't sleep," he said. I looked at him, and I believed it. I could tell he hadn't slept all night.

"So? What does that have to do with me," I asked, confused.

"Actually, it's about Patricia…" He had my attention now. Ugh, if only she wasn't so stubborn, they would still be together.

"I'm listening," I informed him.

"Well, I heard you guys talking the other day, and I happened to hear Yacker say she still likes me," he paused to smirk, very full if himself I must add, "And obviously, I'm crazy for her-"

"Definitely obvious," I added, cutting him off. He glared at me.

"-And I was wondering if you could give me some tips?" I thought about it and came up with something perfect, feeling vey Amber-like.

"Don't worry Eddie, I know what to do. All you have to do is show up to a movie at 7:00." Everything about him perked up when I said this, his face instantly transforming from worried, to grinning.

"Than-"He started to thank me, but it was too late because I already shut the door on him, determined to carry out operation Peddie.

Eddie's POV

Fabian glanced at me as I walked into our room. "Where have you been?" He asked me.

"Just grabbing an early morning snack, I couldn't sleep," I lied. I wasn't about to make it public that I was still pining for my ex-girlfriend. After talking to Joy, (which went pretty well if you don't count her slamming the door in my face), I feel pretty reassured. It's not like she tried to deny Patricia saying she liked me or anything. I realize its lame, but I can't stop thinking about her; I can't sleep. It wasn't like this movie was an official date, but I vowed, if I got the chance, I would make it one.

Patricia's POV

I got up, thanks to Mara and her stupid alarm clock, and got ready for school. As I walked out the door to join my housemates for breakfast, I was surprised to see Joy waiting for me outside my door. She looked annoying excited, and I was pretty sure I didn't want to know why. I swear, if she says something about Fabian… "Trish-a-a!" She sing-songed. Yep, it was definitely about Fabian. The only other thing Joy gets excited about is me and Eddie. Oh, shit. Eddie must have told Joy something.

"Um ya, hi Joy!" I said hurriedly, side-stepping her and fast walking to breakfast. I took a seat between Willow and Alfie, trying to make myself unavailable to Joy. She came in, frowned disapprovingly, and sat down next to Alfie. Saved for now, I thought. Eddie kept giving me these really weird looks, but I ignored him. He looks cute today. Wait did I just say that? Ugh, what's wrong with me? Something was up with Eddie and Joy, I could sense it. As soon as I got up, Joy practically pounced on me. She slipped her arm in mine saying,"Hey Trish!"

"Hi," I said unenthusiastically, yanking my arm free. I was being pretty rude, but it didn't faze Joy. She was used to it.

"We're going to a movie tonight!" She pronounced, not giving me an option. I eyed her suspiciously, and then sighed.

"Fine, but it better not be a romance movie." Joy looked at the floor guiltily.

"Joy! No! I'm not going."

"Yes you are. It's final." And with a flip of her hair, she stalked off, really reminding me of Amber. That was the thing about Joy. She could get me to do just about anything, and she knew it. It pissed me off. The day dragged on boringly. It seemed the teachers were favoring unnecessary lectures today. I would never admit it, but I was kind of looking forward to a girl's movie night. Maybe I should tell Joy to invite Mara. Anyways when I brought it up to Joy later she acted all weird, saying something about wanting to spend time with just me. I don't buy it. Something's up. After dinner, I decided to get ready for movie night, because Joy wanted to leave early. For my outfit, I settled on a pair of dark-wash jeans, killer boots, a deep, red top, and a leather jacket. I refreshed my even, but loose, curling iron curls, fussing with my hair until it was perfect. For makeup, I wore a thick layer of both top and bottom liner. I have to admit; I looked pretty good, and felt good too.

Joy's POV

Operation Peddie was going pretty smoothly. Patricia had almost ruined it by asking Mara to come, but I fixed it. And of course she was reluctant to come, but I got her to go. It was almost time for us to leave, so I slipped into light skinny jeans, a light purple top, deep purple heels, and a black sweater. I went downstairs, and met Patricia at the door. "You look good," I said.

"You too," she replied, not being sarcastic for once. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Eddie coming, so I quickly yanked Patricia out the door and into my car.

Eddie's POV

It was time to meet Patricia and Joy at the movies, and I was physicked. I wore jeans and a T-shirt, not bothering to dress up. I look good in anything, and I pretty sure Patricia thinks so too. I pulled on a sweatshirt over my tee, and headed to the door. I caught a glimpse of Joy rushing Patricia out the door, so I decided to wait a little while before leaving, not wanting to chance being seen. After about 5 minutes, I left in my car.

Patricia's POV

We arrived at the 7:00 showing of Beautiful Creatures at 6:50. After getting our popcorn and drinks, we went into the theater. It was small, and could probably fit about 50 people. Except it was deserted. There was not one other person in it. We waited, and eventually someone else did show up. "Eddie?!" I said angrily. So much for girl's night.

Joy's POV

Eddie arrived about 7 minutes after me and Trixie. He entered in his usual casual clothing. I sighed. Definitely not date material. Patricia caught sight of him and started freaking out and screaming at me. I calmed her down, or at least tried to. I made a show of coughing. "Um, sorry Trixie, I'm not feeling good. I'm going to go home, but don't worry, Eddie will bring you home." He winked at Patricia. She groaned. I smiled. My work was done. The fact that Patricia and Eddie were alone together in a dark room would do the rest for me. More than one thing was bound to happen.

Patricia's POV

I couldn't believe Joy, setting me up like that. I bet she planned it all out this morning. Eddie, still standing, came over to me and sat in the spot Joy had been sitting in a second before. I sighed, shot him a look, and got up to move a couple of seats down to put some space between us. He didn't let me. No sooner had I gotten up, that my hand was grabbed and I was yanked down, back into my seat. I looked at him viciously.

"Try that again and I swear-"

"Hey Yacker," he said softly, cutting me off and staring into my eyes intensely. I couldn't help it. He made me stupid and clumsy. I couldn't think coherently.

"Hi," I mumbled, frustrated. Was that really the best thing I could come up with? I looked away suddenly feeling self-conscious.

"You look really pretty tonight," He continued putting me under a sort of spell, and it was starting to piss me off. I didn't reply, pretending to ignore him. I stared at the screen, telling myself that I was alone watching a movie. I prayed he wouldn't bring up that he knew I still liked him. Secretly I was thrilled he was trying to get me back at all, but my stubborn side always takes over. Well, usually. It seemed to disappear along with my brain when Eddie was talking. I couldn't stand being there anymore. I got up and starting walking out of the theater.

"Where are you going?" He asked me, getting up and standing perfectly in my way.

"I'm going home," I stated. He looked at me and I saw a flash of hurt in his eyes.

"You can't. I'm your ride, remember?" Oh, I remembered. I couldn't forget if I wanted to.

"Well I guess I'm walking then," I said rudely. I tried to walk around him, but he wouldn't let me escape him. I put my hand on his chest, and forcibly pushed him back and to the side. It stunned him enough to give me a clear escape route. I didn't run- I wasn't stupid. Instead, I calmly walked out. He watched, surprised, before running after me. "Patricia, wait," he begged me, "Give me a chance please." I stopped. It gave him the time he needed to grab my hand and lead me back to my seat. I sat down and glared. He smiled.

"I knew it," He said.

"Excuse me?" I said, exaggerating my accent a little.

"I knew you wouldn't leave," he stated simply. That really bothered me.

"Want to bet?" I asked him, standing up quickly.

"Calm it, Patricia. I'm sorry," he apologized. I relaxed, sitting down again. I started watching the movie. Something about a witch who falls in love with a mortal. Boring. I wished I brought my IPod. It seemed like just the sort of movie Joy would choose. Eddie kept glancing at me, and it was extremely distracting. The characters in the movie started kissing, and I tensed. It reminded me of us. Eddie noticed, of course, and smirked at me. I'm not exactly sure how it happened, but the next thing I knew we were kissing. Time drifted away, I couldn't see, I couldn't feel anything but his lips on mine. I couldn't even remember what 2+2 equals.

-POV

It didn't seem like a "missing you" kiss. It was born from desire and longing, the intense kind that could only come from deep inside them. The kind of passion, rage, hurt, and frustration; everything they had ever felt for each other summed up in one kiss.

Eddie's POV

Patricia's stubborn nature was really starting to get on my nerves. She almost ruined our date on multiple occasions. I could tell she was trying to ignore me. She didn't have to say anything, I knew how she felt. But it didn't matter; I was determined. So I kissed her. I grabbed her, put her in my lap, and kissed her. She didn't push me away, which only encouraged me. She was mine; I was in control. It didn't take long for her to catch up to me; we were lost in our passion for each other. The movie ended, but we didn't stop. Couldn't. I pulled her closer, pushed by my instinct, kissing her with my whole being; with everything I had. She pulled away, breathless, but I wasn't done. I recaptured her lips, my hands on her waist, kissing down her neck. It wasn't enough. I need all of her, and I needed it now.

Patricia's POV

Eddie paused for a second, allowing my brain to start semi-functioning. I became aware of reality, realized where exactly I was. I scrambled off him, scaring myself with thoughts of what could've happened.

"E-Eddie, we have to go," I stammered, "The movie is over."

"So? 5 more minutes?" he pleaded with me.

He didn't understand me. Didn't he see? He and Joy set me up. I slipped and fell into his trap again.

"I'm done," I said, leaving.

"Done? What are you talking about?"

"With you, this, everything, this isn't what I want."

"Oh really? You're denying your feelings for me? Even though I heard you say you still like me?" he yelled.

"Well maybe I just wanted to figure it out on my own terms, without being set up!" I yelled back.

"And maybe I just thought I deserved an explanation after you broke up with me for, I don't know, no reason?"

"You wouldn't understand if I told you!" We were screaming at each other now.

"Would I? You might know if you ever actually gave me a chance to!" I hated fighting with him.

"Eddie, bring me back. I want to go back to the school," I said softly. But he was still angry, not letting it go as easily.

"So that kiss meant nothing to you?" he said, softer now. I knew I couldn't lead him on any more than I already had. I couldn't face my apparent feelings for him. They were so strong. I knew if we got back together it would tear us apart.

"No," I whispered, "Nothing at all." It was a blatant lie. I couldn't believe he didn't see through it. There was so much pain and hurt on his face, that I wanted to take it back. But I knew it was better for both of us if I didn't. We got into his car, not talking. He wouldn't even look at me.

Eddie's POV

"It was nothing." The words repeated themselves in my head, screaming at me. My vision clouded over, despair overtaking me. I felt my happiness slipping away, stabbing me in the heart every second I sat next to her. It was the realization that tore me down. To the girl I loved more than life itself, I was nothing. For a second, I lost control of the car. I didn't see the black minivan until it hit us from behind.

Patricia's POV

The ear-piercing crunch of car against car was unmistakable. Time slowed to a stop. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. I lost count of how many cars hit us. Each new impact traumatizing. I couldn't scream, my voice wouldn't let me. The last impact was the worst, colliding with his car at such force that the car spiraled out of control, and flipped completely over. The airbags failed. Eddie was thrown forward, and I found my scream as his skull impacted with glass. It shattered into a million pieces, producing an unbelievable sound. He had gone clean through the windshield, head first. It stopped then. "Eddie! Eddie!" I shrieked his name over and over. I had to get out of here. I had to help him. Now. I didn't have to get out to know Eddie's car was totaled. The road was covered in twisted shards of metal, paint, and glass. I became aware of two things in that moment. 1. I was stuck, wedged in between the crushed front and back of the car. 2. Every moment I was stuck, Eddie was getting closer to death.

Eddie's POV

I was lying on the ground unmoving. My head was throbbing, and shards of glass were sticking out every visible inch of my body. I'm pretty sure my leg was also broken. I heard the disturbing snap when I landed on it at an unnatural angle. I felt guilty and responsible for everything. I thanked God it was me and not Patricia. I could hear him screaming for me, but I couldn't answer. "I'm sorry," I whispered. Another trauma of pain rocketed throughout my body, and I blacked out, unknowingly slipping into a coma.

Patricia's POV

If I couldn't help Eddie, someone else would. I called 911, realizing I was the only person that could still function. I heard the sirens, and the sound pulsed through my head, increasing the pain of my headache. Then I called Joy.

Joy's POV

I was sitting on my bed wondering why Patricia and Eddie weren't back yet. I figured they were just staying a little after the movie to, you know, catch up. They better be back soon though, Victor locks up at 10:00. My phone began ringing, and I searched for it, answering on about the third ring. It was Patricia. "Patricia! Are you almost back?"

"Joy-help-please-Eddie..." static buzzed in my ear, cutting her off every third word. It was soft, because she was talking in a strained whisper. I could tell she was scared, probably for Eddie, and I knew she was hurt.

"I'm coming," I promised her, hanging up. KT and Willow looked over at me. "I think Eddie and Patricia are in a car crash. They're both hurt." They looked surprised, but I didn't wait for a reply. I ran to the door, ignoring Victor yelling at me. If they were in a car crash, the traffic would be unbearable. I wouldn't be able to get to them fast enough. So I ran. I ran the fastest I had ever run in my entire life, driven by my fear and concern for my friends. I spotted where the car crash happened. I didn't stop running until I reached Eddie's car. I realized why Patricia couldn't help Eddie; she was trapped in the car. By the time I approached her, tears were steadily flowing down her cheeks. She motioned to go in front of the car. I found Eddie unconscious, covered in glass, blood streaming down his skin. His leg was twisted oddly to the left. I screamed. I thought he was dead. I really did. It was a horrifying sight. I picked up his body, and sighed with relief as I felt a pulse. He was heavy, and the glass slipped under my skin where my arms supported him. But I had to keep going. I yelled for a policeman, who hadn't seen him before. They were busy rescuing everyone else. It seemed Patricia was the only one still conscious. "Please help him," I begged them. Their eyes widened, and they took action immediately. Eddie was rushed to the hospital in critical condition. After I rescued Eddie, I went back for my best friend. She was in hysterics, hurting more internally that on the outside. I forced open the door, which was also badly damaged. I helped her get out, and we got into the ambulance together. My arms circled around her protectively, I didn't let her go. She couldn't stop crying, sobs racketing through her body. Her devastation swallowed her up, and she couldn't talk. I didn't ask her what happened, fearing I would upset her more than she already was.

Patricia's POV

I had seen the police man take Eddie away in that stretcher. He looked dead. It was my fault, I knew it was. And all I could think was if he dies during the night I wouldn't ever have the chance to tell him the truth. That I love him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry this chapter is kinda short! Ill update soon though.**

Patricia's POV

It's been two months since the accident. Eddie was still in a coma. After this much time, the chances of him waking up were slim to none. Mr. Sweet and Mrs. Miller, Eddie's parents, agreed for the doctors to keep him alive for one year. If he wasn't awake by then, they would take him off life support, and he would die. I visited him every day after school ended for the day. At first, I refused to come home, staying with him for a week strait. I would sit on a chair next to him, waiting, and cry. The doctors had to kick me out eventually, but I put up a good fight, kicking and screaming. After that, depression engulfed me. Guilt controlled me. I no longer thought before acting, it was all impulse. I wouldn't talk to anyone, ever. I couldn't remember the last time I smiled, never mind laughed. My physical body felt nothing, which is why I started cutting. Seeing myself bleeding made me feel better, like I was being avenged for what I'd done. I cried every night, haunted by the only thing I had left of Him, memories, and woke up every morning expressionless. I simply ignored the world. I no longer made an effort in school, my grades slipping from B's to D's, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything anymore. I took another gulp of alcohol, ignoring to burn, trying to numb the pain, and wished for the hundredth time that I'd died in the accident.

Joy's POV

I was genuinely extremely concerned for Patricia. She wouldn't talk to me, or anyone actually. She was really sinking. Her depression worsened every day, but she refused help. Mara told me she's been drinking, having found a secret stash of Vodka in her closet. I was scared she was going to do something even more stupid.

Eddie's POV

I was awake, but I couldn't move. It was weird to be aware of your surroundings but not be able to control your own body. I couldn't feel anything. I tried really hard to open my eyes, but I couldn't. I think they twitched though. "Eddie?"a voice whispered. The girl told the doctors I was waking up, and I think they believed her. I slowly started to regain control of my movements, finally able to open my eyes. I was looking into the faces of four people, a doctor, two nurses, and a beautiful girl about my age. They all seemed to be surprised I was awake.

"How are you feeling after being in a coma for two months?" the doctor asked me. Two months? It felt more like a day. It sunk in how rare it was to wake up after two months.

"Fine," I said. The girls was sobbing,

"Eddie, I sorry, so sorry, I love you so much."

"And who are you?" I questioned, confused.

Patricia's POV

I was paralyzed in shock and hurt. My heart tore in two. My happiest dream had just become my worst nightmare. Eddie was awake, and he didn't remember me. It was one thing to be lost in hopeless guilt for a dead lover, but it was a new pain entirely to be lost in hopeless guilt for the love of your life to be alive and not know you. I couldn't get out of there fast enough. I didn't stop running until I was in my room, away from everyone. My phone rang, and I immediately recognized the number as a hospital.

"Hello," I answered tentatively, my voice sounding strange after not using it for so long.

"Patricia Williamson?" a man's voice asked.

"Yes?"

"We're sorry to inform you of this, but your parents have died in a tragic accident." I couldn't believe it. Was this somebody's idea of a sick joke?

"Excuse me?"

"We're sorry." _Click_. The phone hung up. This couldn't be happening. A surge of remorse rocketed through me as I thought of all their calls that I'd ignored feeling sorry for myself. And just like that, everything was gone. Parents, gone. Friends, lost. Eddie, ripped away from me. All I had left was grief. So much I was blinded by it. I realized how fragile life seemed to be for everyone but me. I made the connection that my life was like the earth. I had run in green fields, flowers everywhere I looked, blooming from happiness. I had wandered through deserts, trying to find my way out of abandonment. I had swum through trouble and longing. After the accident, I was pulled toward a cliff. Eddie in a coma made me stand close to the edge. By the time Eddie woke up not remembering me, my toes were off the edge. My parents dying led one of my feet off; I was balanced on the edge of life and death. In that moment, I decided I was done teetering on the edge, being pushed by deaths, and pulled back but tiny sparks of hope. I didn't have any love left, and without love I decided I didn't want life. Tonight, I wouldn't let hope tug me back. Tonight, life would no longer keep me imprisoned. Tonight, I would jump.

Joy's POV

"Are you sure you don't want to come bowling with the rest of Anubis house?" I asked Patricia. She nodded yes. "OK," I said unsure if I should trust her alone. I gave her one last lingering glance as I left her, deciding she would be fine. Besides, if she hadn't tried anything yet, she wouldn't tonight I thought. Right?

Patricia's POV

It was time. I sat on my bed, convincing myself that this was right, that no one would miss me. Convincing myself the place I would end up would be happy and not force suffering on me. I ignored all my better judgment, ignored the voice nudging me to change my mind. I wouldn't be careful anymore. With shaking hands, I dragged the razor down into my skin.

Eddie's POV

I couldn't understand why I didn't remember that girl. The doctor kept showing me pictures of us, trying to jog my memory, but I couldn't remember ever taking them with her. I began to watch TV, and froze when I saw people on a Ferris wheel. Memories of her came rushing back to me all at one. She was my one love, my only love. Something was telling me to go find her, and fast. I got up suddenly, heading for Anubis House. I didn't actually know where to go; something was leading me. I also didn't know why, or how, but I was going to save her.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Chapter 4 everyone! hope u like it :)**_

Patricia's POV

I watched as the first drop of my newly oxygenated, poison apple red blood slowly slid down my arm, and dripped onto the floor. It reminded me of the tears that fell from my eyes; my weaknesses, grief and pain. I couldn't feel it anymore. Concentrating on my inner pain and the lyrics I had blasting in my room, I picked up the razor, and I went over the same spots again and again. Drip. Drip. Drip. And I didn't stop until I slipped into darkness.

Eddie's POV

I didn't realize I was running until I reached Anubis house out of breath. It was like my subconscious controlled my actions. I slowed down, catching my breath, but I kept being urged by instinct to run again. I tried my best to ignore it, thinking I would look like an idiot if I showed up in Patricia's room sweating. I hesitated as I reached the door, not really knowing what to say to her. I could hear the unmistakable lyrics of I Hate You by Sick Puppies playing, no, blasting, from within her room. I smiled, reminded of us. God, I loved her so much. I turned the door knob, not expecting what was clearly before my eyes. She lay on the floor, blood everywhere. An empty bottle of alcohol lay sideways on the floor, for the part she hadn't finished spilled out in a puddle underneath her, mixing into the blood. No, no, no. This could not be happening. I froze in fear and guilt, wishing I had kept running. It hurt to know she had done this to herself. Because of me. I ran to her calling her name, and sunk to the floor in despair. She looked dead, but not the peaceful kind. She looked completely miserable. I was too scared to check for a pulse, fearing the worst. I cried; the last words I said to her asking her who she was echoing over and over in my head, making me even more miserable. Gone, I kept thinking, she was gone. Even if she was still alive, she was dead inside. I knew then that I couldn't live without her. If I stayed here helpless, I would die just like her. What was I still doing here? There was a chance of saving her, it was low, but I didn't care. I would do whatever it takes to save her. A surge of hope and longing surged though me, giving me the strength I needed. I took my love into my arms and went as fast as I could to her car. The blood was still flowing freely from both of her wrists, seeping into my shirt. I gently put her into the passenger seat. Then I drove like hell to the hospital.

Patricia's POV

Something wet dripped onto my face, bringing me back to consciousness. I opened my eyes, and recognized I was looking into the eyes of Eddie, who was crying. My first thought was that I was in heaven. But then why was he crying? We were supposed to be happy in heaven. And then I knew. I was in the hospital, alive. A mix of emotions ran through me, mostly relief and anger. A part of me was relieved to be alive, that Eddie saved me. But a stronger part was angry, this was supposed to work. I was supposed to be dead. Of course it would be Eddie who would ruin my plans. "Patricia?" Eddie whispered. I stiffened. He had remembered.

"Way to ruin my plans you jerk," I said. He smiled.

"Love you too."

Eddie's POV

I had done it. She was alive and I knew she was going to be OK as soon as she said that to me. We were going to be together. I felt it. I would never, ever leave her again.

Joy's POV

The first I did when we got back to Anubis house was check on Patricia. The others kept saying she was fine and that I was over reacting, but I knew her better than them. I had a bad feeling about it. "Patricia? Patricia!" I called to her through the closed door. She didn't answer. "I'm coming in," I said. I opened the door and screamed. The blood... there was so much blood. It soaked through the once-white sheets, covered the floor, stained the carpets. The room seemed to take on a red hue. But Patricia was nowhere to be found. I prayed to god she was OK, wherever she was. Wasn't losing Eddie enough?

Patricia's POV

Eddie had said he loved me. I decided to tell him everything. How I never got over him, and lied about the kiss, how I felt in the car accident, how depression took its hold on me, him not remembering me, and my parents death. It spilled out easily, and he listened. He was patient with me, something I had never seen from him before. He seemed to understand. He apologized, over and over again. Then he told me how he'd found me and almost given up. "I love you Eddie," I confessed, "I love you so much."

"I love you too," he told me, very seriously this time. We smiled at each other, thankful we had both made it through alive. We were finally being honest. He kissed me gently, and I responded immediately. We moved perfectly in sync, like we were made for each other. My phone rang, interrupting us. Eddie look annoyed. I hadn't even realized it was in my pocket. I looked at the caller ID; it was Joy. Oh great, I thought, she probably found the mess in my room, and would be in hysterics. This was something I couldn't deal with at the moment with my aching head.

"Can you get it for me?" I asked Eddie.

"Sure," he said.

Eddie's POV

"Hello?"

"Eddie?!" Joy said frantically, "When did you wake up? And are you with Patricia? Is she OK? Because I found all this blood in her room and-"

"Joy, calm down. Yes, Patricia is with me and she's fine. I brought her to the hospital in time. And I woke up from my coma this afternoon."

"Oh thank God. I'm coming." With that, she hung up.


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry its been a while! But here is chapter 5! Ill update as soon as possible, and I hope you like it :)**

Joy's POV

I was beyond relieved Eddie was awake to save my best friend, and I wanted to be there for her. But I was still haunted by the grotesque sight that was her room. It flashed through my head over and over again; a living nightmare. I was scared to see her. I closed my eyes as I sucked in a deep breath of air, and walked in. Eddie had Patricia locked in a passionate kiss. They sprang apart awkwardly, but I was too worried about her to succumb to an uncomfortable silence. Instead, I ran to her and took her into my arms for a bear hug. "Be careful," Eddie cautioned me. I glared daggers into him. Did that rule only apply to me? Because when I walked in he wasn't exactly being gentle either.

"Oh Trish," I wept, "Never scare me like that again."

"I'm sorry," she whispered softly.

"Patricia?" a shaky voice asked into the momentary silence as a figure walked into the room. Piper. Her red-rimmed, sullen eyes were consumed by the dark circles that surrounded them. It was clear she had been crying for a while now. I realized I still clung to Patricia, reluctant to let go. I surrendered and released her to make room for a distraught Piper.

"I thought I was going to lose you too," she whimpered, a sob escaping every couple of words, and faintly asked, "Did you do it because of them?" I saw Patricia tense in her arms.

"Them?" I asked. What was she talking about? Wasn't this because of Eddie?

"You didn't tell her?" Piper asked, her surprise temporarily masking her grief.

"Tell me what?" I demanded.

"We're orphans now," she whispered, so quietly it was barely there at all. I froze as it sunk in. Only three words, yet they were so powerful, horrifying me, shocking me. A shiver rattled my bones. I began to go through all the what ifs, and realized there was absolutely no doubt that I had caused this whole mess. It was unquestionably my fault. If only I hadn't forced Eddie onto Patricia, everything could have been avoided. If only I had picked something at Anubis house instead of the movie, my life would be normal again. Her parents would be alive to give her comfort, she would still look to me as her best friend in the entire world, and she wouldn't have depression issues or be suicidal. The word suicidal seemed so foreign to me; I couldn't accept the fact that it described Patricia. Sure, she had always been a rebel, but never this bad; depression had never taken over her until now.

"I'm so sorry," I said genuinely, tearfully.

"Thank you," she said softly, "The funeral is tomorrow."

Patricia's POV

I was released from the hospital just to go to the funeral, declared "not stable enough" to be released full time. Whispers taunted me at every turn, impossible to block out. Looks thrown at me with each step I was forced to take; some sympathetic, some disgusted. Living through a suicide attempt was a lot harder than dying. I would forever be known as the "girl who tried to kill herself", and I knew it. I'd always be that girl, the one parents drag their children away from, the outsider. I didn't have any illusions about how this affected my future. My choices had destroyed it. "Ready?" Eddie's voice broke off my train of thought. I nodded a lie too weak to actually convince him I was. I tried to smile to assure him, but the way he perceived it, I guessed it probably looked more like a grimace. I wouldn't ever be ready for my parents' funeral, but we left together all the same. It ended up being hellish, like I'd thought. The only comfort I found was in the warmth of Eddie body. I felt the sunshine of his care encircle me like a protective coating. He had me wrapped up in him. Strong arms held me, and I melted under his embrace. But it wasn't long before the whispers devoured me. They were so far away, so soft, and yet so loud, so piercing to me. I didn't have one tear even form through the time I was there. I couldn't. It felt I didn't have anything left to give my parents. I couldn't feel anything but numbness. So numb. I felt Joy's eyes on me, but I couldn't meet them with mine. I didn't want anything to do with the concern, the sympathy held there in the shine of her eye. I was so past sick of people being nervous around me. So sick of concerned faces watching me intensely to make sure I didn't shove a knife into my arm again. I didn't want her pity, I wanted my friend back. Why couldn't she see I was still the same person? Every part of the person she'd known was still in here somewhere, buried deep within. So why was she giving up on me? Why can't she see that I need her? Eddie sensed my discomfort, and gave me a gentle squeeze. I was thankful for him, but I think I was already too far gone to respond.

**~HEY EVERYONE I HAVE CHAPTER 6 HALF WRITTEN AND TYPED AND BEFORE I FINISH IT I WAS WONDERING IF ANYONE HAD ANY SUGGESTIONS TO WHAT THEY WANT TO SEE IN CHAPTER 6 OR FUTURE CHAPTERS!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Here is Chapter 6. I figured Id write it faster than the other ones cuz u guys had to wait so long for chapter five!**

Eddie's POV

I could see Patricia was struggling, and she needed me. It wasn't hard to sense her frustration with Joy; the tension was like an invisible wall between them. She appeared to be fine, seemingly having no emotion at all. But I saw right through that lie, knowing at this funeral she was losing not only her parents, but a piece of herself too. It seemed like the last bit of innocence and tranquility of life was being yanked out from underneath her. I wasn't having any doubts she was going to be OK, but I knew in my heart this would be tough year, even if I didn't want to accept it. The realization made my decision final. I would do everything possible to protect her, no matter how far I had to go.

Patricia's POV

The part of the funeral I was dreading the most was quickly approaching, the part where I'd have to shake people's hands while they mumbled, "sorry for your loss." I had tried everything to get out of it, but Piper insisted. "A couple of genuine hugs are just what you need," she's said. She was so wrong. It was exactly what I didn't need. I took my place at the exit of the funeral home and inhaled deeply, trying to mentally prepare myself. After what seemed like forever, I lost track of how many halfhearted thank-yous I said. I shook many hands unwillingly, but no one dared to hug me. I think they knew better than to try that, considering the threatening expression that I most likely had plastered on my face. I felt countless uncomfortable stares lingering on me, searching me. I was thinking it couldn't get much worse until a boy about 17 with a big mouth decided to ask me the question that was without a doubt on everyone's mind. "Is it true that you tried to kill yourself?" He asked loudly. There was a brief silence as every pair of eyes in the room came to settle on me. I opened my mouth to tell the kid to fuck off when Eddie came out of nowhere and slipped one arm possessively around my waist.

"That isn't any of your business," he said coldly.

"Can't even let the poor girl answer for herself, can you?" He taunted Eddie, taking a step closer, challenging him. Bad idea. Turning to me, he spat, "Are you his girlfriend or his pet?" And that was all it took for Eddie to snap. I was 99% sure that he threw the first punch. I stood frozen in my place. A collective gasp of horror ran through the crowd. A couple of younger girls screamed. The only thing in my line of vision was blur of blood and fists. The crunch of shattered bone resonated, and the smack of knuckles hitting jawbone sickened me. This was not happening at a funeral, my parent's funeral. I'd had enough.

"Stop, Eddie, STOP!" I yelled at them. No one moved as the commotion halted. Then everyone started talking at the same time. A rush of nausea and anger ran through me. I needed to leave. Now. Eddie noticed and with one last icy stare took my hand in his, which was streaked with the other boy's blood. I was disgusted with him but I was afraid if I pulled away I would fall. Shocked eyes followed me; the whispers stalked me. I kept hearing my name and it echoed through my head, pounding a steady beat of a drum. A stabbing pain erupted, allowing the realm of delusion to take hold, threatening to collapse me. Uncontrollable shivers racked at my body. My lip quivered. I stumbled, and my vision hazed. I lost any sense of time after that, but I did feel Eddie's toned arms lift me, and I surrendered into a deep sleep, feeling safe for the first time in a while.

I woke the next day in the hospital, which was exactly where I didn't want to be. Luckily the nurse claimed that I'd made enough progress and would be able to leave soon. It was "strongly encouraged" for me to sign up for sessions with a shrink, but no way was I doing that. No way. I didn't care who told me to, I wasn't going, ever. If anyone decided to drag me in there, I would deal by saying absolutely nothing at all. And I'm pretty sure everyone knows I can do that. I looked over and saw Eddie sitting in a chair next to the bed. He had a swollen mass of purple and green under his right eye, but other than that he seemed fine. It had been pretty obvious the other kid took the worst of it; Eddie was a lot stronger than him, but he had gotten a couple of good punches in. What idiots. "What?" He asked, finding himself to be the object of my annoyed stare.

"Why did you have to be a jerk and ruin my parent's funeral?" I said. He looked at me in disbelief.

"Me? That boy started it by asking that question. I was doing you a favor, protecting you." Ugh, boy logic.

"By fighting? You couldn't have defended me with words?" Eddie got up angrily and walked out of the room saying,

"I'll be anywhere else when you feel like thanking me." I clenched my fists furiously. I happened to glance out the window and saw him walking out to his car. I got up and went to the window, watching him speed away. I knew he'd be back in about an hour to apologize to me, like usual. But I did feel kinda bad, he really is the only one always there when I need him.

"Trish, what are you doing?" Joy asked nervously, walking into the room.

"Just looking longingly out the window thinking how great it would be to jump from it," I answered sarcastically.

"That isn't funny," She said, "I really care-"

"Oh really? Then why did you give up on me? You don't even treat me like I'm your friend anymore!" Her hand raised threateningly as sharp stings exploded in my cheek. She SLAPPED me. I couldn't believe her, who did she think she was? She looked down at her hands horrified.

"Patricia, I'm sorry, I swear I didn't mean to-"

"Don't." I pushed her away and left the room, hurrying away to anywhere else but here.

HEYY ALL! I PROMISE I DID NOT GIVE UP WITH THIS STORY IVE JUST BEEN BUSY CUZ I ONLY HAVE A WEEK LEFT OF SCHOOL.. SO STRESSFUL... ANYWAYS I AM IN THE MIDDLE OF CHAPTER 7 SO HANG ON :)))


	7. Chapter 7

_**I know this chapter is short, but I wanted to give you guys something after waiting so long... sorry about that... and I wanted to thank Ruthdancegirl for giving me the new reviews recently that influenced me to keep working on it... Thank you! And I can't forget all those other 41 reviews that ive gotten from awesome fans of my story! I LOVE YOU GUYS! :)))**_

Patricia's POV

My speed walk became a sprint, frantically looking for somewhere I could be alone before I broke down. I settled for a secluded area of woods outside the hospital just in time as hot, angry tears spilled over the edge. I'd told myself I would give in to any more moments like this, but I couldn't help it. It was Joy. Betrayal seared through my veins, like she'd burned me. It felt like one of those burns that make it seem like your whole body was on fire, burning alive. Like the ones that only blister with time. She was ashamed of me; embarrassed at my weakness. I dug my black-painted fingernails into the dirt desperately, willing my anger away. It was destructive, especially to me. I knew what I was capable of, along with anyone else who knew about me. I felt something prick at my finger, and I pulled my hand back in surprise. I clawed at the soil, digging it out, and found it was an old pocket knife. Instinctively, I threw it as far away from me as I could, not wanting the temptation. But I could still see the glint of the blade, and even though I was done with that, I felt the effect it had on me. I watched the small, scarlet drop of blood where the knife had pricked my finger and found it had a strangely calming effect. I thought about how easy it would be to stab it into my chest. To end it all now. To try the suicide escape... again. Because there is no "quick and easy" recovery from an attempt, like in the movies. All of the rehab shit will never help someone in pain. Talking about it makes it all real again; it won't fix it. It has to be a decision you make yourself, which precisely my reason for throwing the knife instead of using it. Suicide is the easy way out. The weak way. I wasn't going to be weak anymore, because if there was one word that doesn't belong with the name Patricia Williamson, it would be weak. I believe there was a reason that I survived; a reason for a second chance, with or without Joy.

Eddie's POV

I knew I'd messed up with Patricia, being the ass that I am, and I also knew that I had to apologize. I was pretty sure she'd forgive me, but I'm so afraid that one day she won't have any patience left to forgive me again. She was never the first to apologize after a fight, it was always me. She is so stubborn, which is why I was so surprised when she walked up to me with a sincere apology written all over her face. She didn't have to say anything, I knew. I just knew.


End file.
